Story of the Week: Raise the (False) Flag

Steven had only met Lucy once or twice in person but felt as if he had known her forever. Since the moment he first laid eyes on her at the organizational meeting for the “Armed March on DC”, he knew. And she had that spark in her eyes too – he liked to call it the “Truth Spark”. Lucy wasn’t blind to what this corrupt government was up to. She wasn’t afraid to support the almighty organization Steven was a part of, an organization known as InfoWars.

He had started working for them years ago, and this group was now notorious for acts such as accusing 9/11 to be an inside job (WHICH IT WAS) and implying the Sandy Hook shootings were staged (WHICH THEY WERE) so the government could impose hefty gun restrictions on God fearing Americans (WHICH THEY DIDN’T DO BUT EVENTUALLY WILL). These government organized acts of terror were what his organization called “False Flags” because they made Americans look in the other direction while their rights were callously being taken away.

When Steven first shook the hand of Lucy Hanson, his heart skipped a beat. There was something special about her, and it wasn’t just that she was the first female to walk into the office in months. He would never forget the first thing she said to him.

“Hi, I’m Lucy.”

Just like that. But it was the way she said it that piqued Steven’s interests. They spent the rest of the day with the other three volunteers laughing, plotting, and planning out the march. But then she left, and Steven had regretted not getting her phone number.

But after two sad months, he found himself at a local coffee shop, face to face again with Lucy Hanson. She was ahead of him in line, picking out muffins. They struck up a conversation and this time, he had made sure to leave with her phone number. And since that day one week ago, they exchanged a series of flirtatious text messages that culminated in her saying what he had been thinking all along.

“I want you to talk dirty to me.”

“Ok… fuck,” he responded via text.

“No you dumbass. I want to hear your voice while I’m putting my finger in my wet pussy.”

Steven stared at the text message for about five whole minutes before he could respond. Why, he had never met a woman as sexually free as Lucy, or who had ever said ANYTHING to him like that, or who had ever been interested in him at all, for that matter. He responded in the only was he knew how.

“I’ll call you tonight ;)”

“I hate emoticons.” she wrote back.

“Sorry :(“

“Um…so call me from your home.”

“I can call you from the office – I’m working late”

“I want you to be home. That turns me on more.”

Steven paused. He was supposed to be on patrol at the office that night; there had been rumors that someone from some liberal rag organization was going to try to hack into their system, and the staff took turns watching the office. But Lucy wanted him home, and he wanted Lucy.

“I will call you from home tonight.”

No one would know.

Several tedious hours later, Steven was in his bedroom, on the phone with Lucy and my God, did she turn him on.

“This government doesn’t care about us,” she breathed, moaning in between every few words. “They are just fucking us the way I want to fuck you.”

“Y… yes” Steven could not believe this was happening.

“Where is your hand?” Lucy asked.

“On… on my cock,” He could barely get the words out.

“Yeah? Is it on your thick false flag?”

Steven did his best not to finish right there.

“Oh, yes, yes, it’s… rubbing my flag.”

“How high is your mast?” Lucy moaned.

“So hard.”


“I mean high. So high.” Steven was rubbing his manhood slowly, trying not to burst at any moment.”

“You sliding it up your pole?” Lucy murmured.

“Up and down.”

“Keep doing that,” Lucy whispered. “Mmm. I’m so wet.”

Steven did his best to play along at this game which was so new to him. “You mean you’re lubricated with the sweet holds of freedom?”

Lucy chuckled, “Freedom from the government.”

“It’s so hard right now,” Steven stopped himself before continuing, his hand slowly rubbing the base of his ever stiffening shaft. “I mean, the way the system is. It’s so hard to fight deep, so deeply for a cause.”

“Oh Steven, I’m going to come!”

Lucy’s moans of ecstasy put Steven over the edge. He buckled under the explosion of bliss from his engorged manflesh as the two of them climaxed together.

After a few minutes of breathing into each others phones, Steven was able to speak.

“That was so hot.”

“Yes, yes it was. And now you can say you fucked a real false flag.”

“Excuse me?” Steven sat up a bit.

Lucy laughed mischievously into the phone, “Steven, I’m a mole. I was sent in to distract you from the office. Since we’ve been on the phone, my people have raided your office and hacked into your files. But really, it was fun. We should do this again sometime.”

If cellphones made an old school clicking sound like landline phones did, that’s what Steven would have heard. Lucy hung up, and he sat there stunned. Stunned for so many reasons. First, how could he have been so blind? It was his job to root out people like that and he had failed. Second, he had never felt that way about a woman before, and it had all been a lie. But most important, Steven thought, oh my God: False Flags are actually a real thing. And just that thought made him get another massive erection.